I say that’s entertainment, that’s entertainment

Longwell Green 2-1 Merthyr Town
Saturday 5th November 2011
Toolstation League Premier Division
Longwell Green Community Centre, Longwell Green, Bristol
Attendance: 263

....and the 2011 AiT Poll Winners Party award for 'Least Imaginative Club Nickname' goes to......Longwell Green Sports for their nicknames of; 'The Green' or 'The Sports'. Jeez.

So that's Longwell Green Sports, who play at the Longwell Green Community Centre and are nicknamed 'The Green'; anyone want to take a guess at their club colours?

WRONG

It's blue and white stripes. Obviously.

The nominations for the 'Least Imaginative Club Badge' are in and I can reveal the winner of the award are......with their second award today.....Longwell Green Sports.

They may be unimaginative but they're a friendly and welcoming club. We're warmly greeted at the gate by the Chairman, who takes great delight in seeing two new faces and provides some exclusive team news. The Green have three players out as they are on a stag do in Las Vegas (flip me! Las Vegas. What's wrong with a night out in Bristol and a kebab on the way home these days?? Las Vegas eh? *shakes head*) and one of the midfielders had phoned in at midday with a mysterious, possible beverage related, ailment that left him marooned on the sofa.

If you tolerate this then your children will be next.

Although not everything at Longwell Green Sports is squeaky clean, there's a recent scandal which has engulfed a member of team and is detailed at length in the Chairman's programme notes. "We have had a letter of complaint in this week....with a £50.00 bill for clearing up a port a loo that some how fell over with some one still in side, a club investigation is on going into a matter that is going to kick a bit of a stink in local footballing circles." Arf!

Hermann loves Pauline.

The small community centre, which has recently hosted such events as Claire and Paul's wedding (a doff of the extravagant wedding hat from all here at AiT) and a visit from Paul Weller, is packed, with the only seat available the one underneath the piano in the corner of the room. The trestle table creaks under the weight of the extra, AiT favourite, of chairman's wife made filled bread rolls, the pie oven is full to bursting and the bar tills ringing constantly thanks to a bumper trade of lager and blue WKD (uggh!) being sold to the large crowd of thirsty Welshmen.

That's your actual Paul Weller there.

The Merthyr fans make up about 75% of the crowd and set up a couple of flags on the fence behind the goal, obscuring the views of those too tight to pay the £6 to come in and the team immediately take control while the fans make themselves known to the officials. The linesman gets some friendly advice of when to put his offside flag up and the referee is given some moral support through encouraging shouts like "rubbish referee".

Just before half time, and with mothers in the houses surrounding the pitch frantically seeking to protect their kids from being caught in the cross fire of the barrage of shouts being launched from welsh mouths, the hosts take an unexpected lead thanks to a textbook execution of the 'cross cum shot' from Joe Stearing that loops over the head of the keeper.

Just Enough Education to Perform

The first half ends with the Merthyr fans explaining the foul throw rules to one linesman, who helpfully takes the time to correct them and provide a full demonstration of Law 15 of Fifa's Laws of the Game 2011/12 and demonstrate exactly what constitutes a foul throw. After a period of time that doesn't exceed fifteen minutes, as specified in Law 7b, the second half commences with Merthyr kicking towards their massed ranks of flag bearing vociferous fans and Longwell Green attacking an end where a spaniel chases a tennis ball.

Local boy in the photograph.

The Merthyr fans continue to deploy the international language of screaming to register their disapproval with the referee's performance. There's a shout of "you're killing the game ref" shortly followed by possibly my favourite ever shout of "the game's too big for you." Tremendous. That's a game in the 9th level of football that's been judged as being too big for the ref. If he was to go much lower he'd be sat at home weeping while struggling to maintain order in an unruly game of Super Cup football.

The barracking seems to work. The referee crumbles and gives a soft penalty when a Longwell Green player jumps vaguely near a Merthyr player, making this the most shocking decision involving the Welsh since the NME said that Terris were "the best new band in the UK."

Shortly afterwards the ref falls flat on his face. We all laugh.

Token match shot.

After that the ref seems keen to even things up and one linesmen decides he's not taking anymore nonsense. He responds to accusations that he lives nearby by providing a detailed family history, centring around his great Uncle Cyril Morris, and then barracks a Longwell Green defender for delaying a throw in. The defenders protestations that he's "knackered" are met with a retort of "play at the next level down if you're tired" I guffawed a LOL.

The ref succeeds in evening things up with five minutes left leaving Merthyr equally cursed and blessed. Their captain, Steve Williams, is sent off for a bad challenge and then Longwell Green's defender, Dan Bryant, is sent off after the ensuing handbags and the gladrags. From the resulting free kick Norris side foots The Sports' first shot of the half into the net to give them an unlikely lead.

Generation Terrorists.

From then on Longwell are put under sustained pressure, the keeper comes up for corners and the cross bar is thumped, leaving it shaking like a portaloo in the middle of a roisterous night out with the Green boys. But it's too no avail.

Merthyr fans line the route to the changing rooms and the ref no doubt expects some abuse. He's met with handshakes from The Green manager and chairman and the Merthyr fans are respectful in defeat, acknowledging not every game can be won. With a noisy fan base of this size it won't be long before they shouting about their promotion back up the leagues. Meanwhile The Green have bigger things to focus on, like just what did happen to that portaloo.

Previously on AiT - Hengrove Athletic 0-3 Merthyr Town

Our Love To Admira.

FC Admira Prague 4-3 FK Pencin Turnov
Sunday 23rd October 2011
Divize C
Stadion v Kobylisích, Prague
Attendance: 125

There's much to admire about Admira. I basis this hyperbole on a number of factors.

1. A club badge consisting of a pair of suspicious inter-racial siamese twin horses.

2. The photos adorning the walls of the bar show a recent complete disregard for the bog standrard team photo. Thanks to the gift of Photoshop the clubhouse walls no longer have to show shots like the famous 1965 man boob eleven.

The famous 1965 man boob eleven. Click to enlarge man boobs - there's not yours tubby.

Now Admira can stand proud their team photo in front of a fervent crowd or in front of their new stadium, which looks more than suspiciously like Stamford Bridge with the letters in the stand seats altered to spell Admira!

Good old Photoshop hey!

Is this a little bit weird, or is it just me?

3. The ground is a superb mix of different areas. It's more of a suburban park than a football ground.

a) THERE IS A KIDS PLAY AREA IN THE GROUND.

In years to come people will stop me and ask me about my presence at the Stadion v Kobylisích , home of Admira Prague for the 10-15 kick off against FK Pencin Turnov and say, “Kenny, did the presence of a kids playground in the ground influence your decision to attend? I will answer truthfully and say that “in a roundabout way it did swing it for me, yes.” *groans*

Needs more wood chippings.

Anyone over the age of six is barred from the kids play area. However here at AiT we giggle childishly in the face of authority and stick our tongues out at the muž and his rules; of course I went on the slide and of course I had a go on the springy wobbly Zebedde thing. I'd be letting myself, and more importantly you, down if I didn't.

Mental age, 6.

b) There are three (three) places to buy beer. Yes, it is 10:15 in the morning, but I'm on holiday so it's alright and it's good to have options.

c) There's a bit of decking in one corner, (who doesn't like decking), with a few tables under Budvar (who doesn't like Budvar), parasols (who doesn't like parasols), for your an al fresco early morning livener.

d) Weeds line the the steep, and staggeringly narrow, grassy terraces that mean anyone with a shoe size bigger than a 10 (Eur 44(forty four) should exercise extreme caution when spectating here. Clowns with large shoes on should seek an alternative viewing spot.

e) At Admira you can sit/stand wherever you like. One lone fan seeks an alternative, flat, viewpoint and sits on his chair, dragged from the decking, and sits down in the ideal place; right on the half way line....and right in front of a blue fence post.


f) Admira offer a retirement home for unlove goal posts. You can sponsor any of the goals in this gallery. When you sponsor a goal your donations are used to help all the goals in our care. With your help Admira can re-pitch all these goals.

g ) The asthetic appeal of even the most ugly aspects of a football ground are considered. A skip is beautifully showcased with it's own fence and seven mini trees landscaping it to create a beautiful scene that no football ground should be without.

4. Their fans, including the obligatory one in huge amounts of khaki and shorts despite the freezing weather, are to be admired for being up and on the sauce this early. Further praise is due for their use of the very self aware “Old Boyz” banner and the use of a drum and old school rattle to kick up a bit of a racket; probably not enough to rouse the sleepy residents of the three fog enveloped tower blocks looming over the stand opposite but impressive at this time of the morning.

They are joined on the steep terraces by the ultras from Turnov, who have arrived complete with their two banners – one quite clearly a blue sheet and a white sheet stitched together and the word 'Fans' felt tipped across the middle. The Admira fans were welcoming to their guests and the club website reports that “both groups showed how to cheer for - well, no insults and provocations. And after the game to fans of both clubs unison promised - in the spring and again in Turnov!” You get the idea, the Admira fans were welcoming.

Token match shot.

The game swings back and forth, like a swing and both sides have their ups and downs, like a see-saw. After 16 minutes Turnov take the lead, only for Admira to equalise straight away. However by 41 minutes, and with the fog relenting to reveal three more tower blocks (10 Eastern European Football i-SPY points) peering over the main stand Admira had just conceded a third, which left three of their defenders slumped and defeated in their six yard box. Again though Admira came back immediately and had reduced the deficit again before half time, thanks for a goal that looped in directly from a corner.

Half time sees time for some more fawning over the club.

5. You've got to love a club that's got it's own club crest on sugar sachets. Well, they're probably out of sachets by the team the EFW lot had purlioned a load as souvenirs.

6. They serve food that isn't sausage! Imagine that. After 4 days surviving on bread, sausage and mustard I was delighted to eat this. Whatever it is, there were unconfirmed reports that it contained potato, it was greasier than the sausage that caused a greasy bail out at Polonia Warsaw.

7. Great choice of music. Admira's equaliser, in the forty sixth minute, resulted in The Outhere Brothers – Don't Stop (Wiggle Wiggle) to be played on the PA.

h) A VIP section that consisted of a wooden bench on some fake grass stuff atop a small concrete building. All with a cracking view of the match, but sadly lacking a roof and prawn sandiwches; at Admira even the VIP's aren't that important.

"Hey Petra! Petra!! Look at me, I'm making a substitution!"

"Give me that Ivan you buffoon, I've told you before not to touch the substitute board. Stop showing off to Petra. Why are you on the touchline anyway? Be gone!"

(mumbles) Stupid lousy Ivan. "Hey Petra! Look, over here. Flat 17...yeah 17...come round anytime."

Oh, I didn't realise they'd kicked off.

After 74 minutes Admira put together a slick move that ends with striker Mičko nodding it in off the cross bar. It caused such excitement even the old boy left his fence post and stood up. Admira admirably held out, despite Turnov being reduced to ten men – it's a well known football fact it's harder to play against ten men - and at the the team swapped high five's with the Admira 'Old Boyz' and about 10 EFWers, including me, desperate to slap the hands of our new Czech 4^th division football heroes.

All Fired Up

Slovan Bratislava 0-0 Paris Saint Germain
Thursday 20th October 2011
Europa League
Stadion Pasienky, Bratislava.
Attendance: 7242

Christmas, my birthday, International Speak Like a Pirate Day. All of these momentous occasions pale into insignificance when compared with the elation that greets the start of the European Football Weekends Oktoberfest; an annual big boys beano like The Inbetweeners Movie but with less girls and more floodlights.

I'll admit to being more than a wee bit excited about the chance to see Slovan Bratislava's former home, the now overgrown Tehelné pole. While circling the ground I'd made some new football friends (they're not my friends alright!!), including a legendary Norwegian who had quit his job and binned his filly to travel round watching European football (*doffs AiT cap*) and a couple of PSG fans.

Misery guts.

Sadly locating the magic door proved problematic, as did the presence of an angry security guard with a hefty baton and the dead eyed stare of a killer. With a group of fellow EFWers in sight in side I was so angry I could have sworn. For some decent pictures have a look here.

A few hours later my new my French friends (they're not my friends alright!!) and around 200 hundred of their onion necklace wearing pals were surrounded by about two hundred of Bratislava's constabulary and refused entry into the ground, despite having arranged their tickets through the club. It seems the police were a bit spooked about the presence of some of 'proper nawty' Boulogne Boys and the PSG fans were frogmarched (weak pun completely intended) to a pub in town. Subsequently some PSG fans have met with club officials to try and get full refunds. Poor form from Slovan there.

Look at them shine. Look at them shine.

The Slovan fans were treated slightly better and given a free t-shirt and a shiny flag to wave as they entered the ground. With the excitement of a magpie in a milk bottle top factory, I snaffled a flag and and shook it like a Polaroid picture as the teams came out; as did all those Slovan fans who weren't stuffing themselves on huge bowls of popcorn and the Zbrojovka Brno Ultras to our right (more of Brno and their fans here) and this served to create an impressive display.

See caption above.

Sadly the match couldn't match up to the impressive initial atmosphere, well – that's what I gained from my occasional glance at the match. My legs were shaking, my eyes bulging and my hands sweaty (yes, I had had a beer) at the sight of a beautiful fire engine in the ground. Yes, a fire engine can be beautiful, especially when it's ramshackle, features wooden ladders on it's roof and is parked up in an Eastern European ground. Don't believe me, just ask Danny Last, he knows, and he's won awards. When I was a young tinpot adventurer eastern European football could only be seen on Des Lynam presented Grandstand and seemed to be played in another far flung grainy world, on pitches surrounded by humongous stands illuminated by hulking great floodlights with numerous pitchside emergency services vehicles. To live this in real life was exciting for me and shows that I mentally still live in the early 80's Grandstand studio.

I can honestly say this was the second happiest I'd been in my life, the first being when I shook Welephant's paw at Weymouth carnival in 1986.

If that wasn't enough, and in fairness it probably more than enough, then my eyes were delighted when they clocked the monstrous scoreboard. The match was still 0-0, I knew this from regular checks of two giant zeros, made of smaller zero's which confirmed the score was, as I suspected, still 0-0. PSG, who according to the UEFA report of the game “arrived in chilly Bratislava looking for the gratifying warmth of victory”, were the better side but nothing much happened. So I used the forty five minute lull in proceedings to work out that this scoreboard contained a total of 12,500 bulbs. My workings are:

Each small square of bulbs measures 5 bulbs x 5 bulbs

Each row of small squares contains 50 small squares

There are ten rows of squares.

Therefore the scoreboard equation, where x = floodlight bulbs, can be explained thus:

x = (5x5) x 50 x 10 = 12,500

Half time sees the fireman head back into the vehicle, open a thermos, pull out some sandwiches and have a little pitchside picnic. I didn't know being a fireman could be this glamorous, it certainly wasn't all football and picnics for Assistant Divisional Officer (ADO) Nick 'Zorba' Georgiadis and Sub Officer John Hallam on London's Burning.

Pass the scotch eggs Ivan.

Fire engine + bizarre mascot = too much for me to take.

After 64 minutes English referee Lee Probert sent off PSG midfielder Clement Chantome for a second booking, despite this PSG looked more likely to score in front of the empty away section. Like Blackwall Fire Station's Blue Watch after Sub Officer John Hallam tragically died in a warehouse fire in 1996 PSG were reduced to nine men unexpectedly when Chico Tiene was sent off 80 minutes.

One final look.

In a sensible moment here on AiT what followed after was a disgrace. Tiene's long walk off was accompanied by monkey chants from large number of the Slovan fans. It was disgusting, idiotic and made even more ridiculous by the fact Slovan had two black players, Bagayoko Mamadou and nationalised Slovakian international Karim Guede and in their own line up. This article on the excellent Britski Belasi website gives more information, including the complete lack of acknowledgement of the chants from UEFA or Slovan so far.

Token match shot.

Slovan put some pressure on PSG but seem content with the point, the final whistle sounding shortly after a free kick pings off the aerial of an ambulance next to the fire engine and around 400 of the bulbs on the scoreboard report the final score as 0-0, which it was.

For a more comprehensive review of proceedings have a read of Stuart Fuller's report over on European Football Weekends.

GAK To The Future

Grazer AK 0-0 SV Tondach Gleinstaetten
Friday 14th October 2011

Regionalliga Mitte
UPC Arena, Graz, Austria.
Attendance: 360

Yesterday's walk to the Donawitz Stadium in Loeben was soundtracked by church bells and took me along beautiful rivers rippling between picturesque hillsides. Today's route to the UPC Arena in Graz took me past the Hip Hop World Championships (It's a little known fact that Public Enemy are actually from Salzburg and that 2 Pac was originally called Zwei Pac), an Aldi and a Hooters.

The sausage with cheese in it I was a big fan of, the student sick sauce not so.

The UPC Arena is home to Grazer AK and their big city rivals Sturm Graz. The stadium was formerly known as the Arnold Schwarzenegge stadium and was changed in 2005 as Arnie revoked the city's right to use the name.Sturm are the current Bundesliga champions while GAK, who were League Champions in 2004, are now in the semi professional Third Division as a result of being docked 28 points in 06/07 and not being allowed to compete in the professional leagues in 07/08.

Self explanatory this one. Doesn't need a caption.

It's clear to see who are the bigger team, Sturm adorned bars and a fan shop line the area around the bland stadium. While Graz's fan shop is a couple of tables inside the ground. The atmosphere builds up nicely; men are despatched amongst the crowd with beers and carrier bags full of pretzels for the sun drenched crowd, fans take their places on piles inducing seats, a battered drum is set up, the 'Red Firm' and 'Graz Society' Ultras banners are taped precariously above the moat that surrounds the pitch and then the most ripped off song in the history of tune is played over the PA, "Football's Coming Home" - GAK style. Lyrics are dicked about with to create "Tears for heroes dressed in red" and the frankly nonsensical refrain of "Heroes in the shirt, everybody's gleaming."

Grazer AK Ultras

Everyone in the ground is (not gleaming) situated in one side of the ground and this creates a decent atmosphere, despite the 15,400 all seater stadium being largely empty. Two Kapo's work to get the Graz fans going and songs are sung about the clubs formation in 1902, about their enduring support; "Dritte Liga ist OK schiess egal" ("3rd division is ok, it doesn't matter"), the obligatory German language "schiess ein Tor fuer uns" (score a goal for us) and, naturally, songs against the opponents, and Sturm, "Ihr seid schiesse wie der SV Sturm." (you are shit, like SV Sturm)

Token match shot.

Gleinstaetten defend resouletly for the first half and Graz fail to break down the defence. The Graz, Red Devil, mascot prowls pitchside and is probably the shittest mascot I've ever seen.....and I've seen Weymouth's 'Terry the Terra-dactyl' mascot - a man wrapped in a purple curtain. The Red Devil is a man dressed in full kit and with an ill fitting cheap beelezebub mask. Must try harder.

WORST.MASCOT.EVER

Half time sees a pack of kids appear and they work tirelessly to clean the stands of empty beer cups. They work as a team, those pitch side directing troops in the stand to ensure no freshly drained glass remains uncollected. Their spirit to cleanliness is noble but then the cent drops, they're after the Euro deposit for the glasses. Good for the environment and entrepreneurial spirit.

The 'Red Firm' and 'Graz Society' are given little to shout for in the second half, so the focus falls on the ref who appears to be in cahoots with the cup collecting kids as each increasingly controversial decision is greeted with a light showering of cups pitch side, which are then instantly fought over like pigeons chasing stale breadcrumbs in Trafalgar Square.

Insane scenes Geoff. *doffs AiT cap to kid vaulting into moat*

Gleinstaetten defend deep and break up play with numerous fouls and deny GAK chances, the first clear chance is hit just over on sixty five minutes. Despite the lack of action the Ultras continue their support and hope a couple of English chants may help things along. Sadly"Come On You Reds" (Come On You Reds) and "Ohhh GAK We Love You" ("Ohhh GAK We Love You") don't help and offering the ref a yeasty incentive by lobbing large amounts of beer in his direction doesn't persuade him to give a penalty shortly before the end.

When the Gleinstaetten keeper dives to get a GAK striker booked with the last foul of the game the fans are rightly outraged. The Red Devil runs behind the goal, rips off his mask, shakes his trident at the keeper and gives him barrels of abuse. The kids are ecstatic with the decision though, it's gonna be a night of endless ice cream and fizzy pop for them as untold riches rein down from the stands.

Token match shot II. Judgement Day.

The final whistle blows and the mascot storms onto the pitch and gets right in the face of the keeper, hundreds of plastic glasses thud down pitch side (a fair few after richocheting off young skulls first), a photographer steps into separate the devil from the keeper and the kids go into a frenzy to build their towers of glasses which, in some instances, are now as tall as them.

BEST.MASCOT.EVER. When Mascot's attack.

Banners are taken down, flags folded away ready and kids stagger under the weight of their new found wealth. Despite the draw GAK remain seven points clear at the top and look well placed to return to professional football. Maybe if they get into financial trouble again, perhaps in Ian Broudie sues for copyright infringement perhaps, they can be safe in the knowledge they can seek financial support from their generation of entrepreneurial fans.

For match highlights click here, although I wouldn't waste your bandwidth to be honest.

I'm Loeben it, Loeben it, Loeben it, Loeben it like this.

DSV Loeben 1-0 SK Sturm Graz II

Friday 14th October 2011
Regionalliga Mitte
Donawitz Stadion, Leoben, Austria
Attendance: 360

When the opportunity arose to go and watch a Austrian 3rd division match I was fairly interested. When I found out DVS Loeben have their own rap song I was keener than R Kelly at a School Disco. The hills are alive with the sound of music and that music is Austrian rap! Oh yes.

I am not a groundhopper.

I am not a groundhopper.

I am not a groundhopper.

It was a trip well worth making. The 6000 capacity Donawitz Stadium is superb, with two long stands on either touchline directing the focus to the stunning views of tree lined hills set against bright blue skies behind each goal. Around three sides of the ground are small steps and behind one goal stand five small sheds which suggested a premature Christmas market could break out at any time.

This is not a groundhopping blog.

This is not a groundhopping blog.

This is not a groundhopping blog.

They are a bit behind the times in Austria. It's still legal to smoke in bars, sadly, so when the third Cumulo nimbus cloud formed in my face it was time to depart The Volley Bar', which really was more of a half volley as it was full to capacity with 12 people in it. It's also still legal to have a mullet haircut, thankfully, and men are sat in barbers in Vienna and beyond clutching and pointing at pictures of their style icon, Toni Polster circa Italia 1990. I counted 5 (funf) mullets and was ecstatic to see a man coiffured like Terry Nutkins.

Textbook mullet. *stands and applauds*

The rap song, some say track, is given a spin, some say rotation shortly before kick off and is predictably woeful. The rap is from MC Shabusta, who is also the stadium announcer (real name: Gernot Tändler) and is titled 'Der geilste Klub der Welt' (The greatest club in the world) which is clearly a lie. A massive lie. Why not have a listen here.

I am not a groundhopper.

According to the club website “The rap will appeal to younger visitors at the stadium and will not be seen as competing with the DSV song by "Johnny & Mary", which is soon available for sale.” Someone phone iTunes, this is going to break the internet. I'm lucky I get to hear both. The second club song has the chorus "Wir sind dabei bei DSV" (we are there with the DSV) and is sung Mary, who I imagine is probably in her mid 40's and works long days as a glamorous shift supervisor in a frozen food warehouse. A banner with the words 'Green Elite' is hauled from one of the garden sheds and stuck to a railing and we're ready to spiel fussball ja!

The DSV Loeben team from 1980. Click and enlarge to have a look at that womens suit jacket. Please wear protective glasses.

Loeben line up with a Vier-Vier-Zwei formation and the Sturm kids go with Funf-Drei-Zwei. Loeben's tactics focus around their left (links) back. He receives the ball from every goal kick to instigate attacks and when he hasn't got the ball he focuses on booting the opposition.

Token non shot of hills.

As the match continues Austrian radio booms from the one garden shed selling beers to their solitary customer; one hammered non mullet sporting bloke. He chants " hier regiert der SV Sturm" (SV Sturm rein here) to no one and breaks out some ironic dance moves, while everyone else moves only to shiver. Cold beers are offered to cold fans by a couple of cold small kids walking around the terraces with what looks like an adapted joiner's toolbox full of pints and a basket full of pretzels just before half time. No one buys anything and I'm shaking like a shitting dog by now.

A bit of Lady Gaga on the shed jukebox signals the start of the second half and Loeben push forward, sadly their corners are shocking, three in quick succession slapping the forehead of the first Graz defender. Graz should have taken the lead after an hour but over indulge themselves by trying to walk the ball in and after that the play is all Loeben.

Token match shot.

They bring on Marco Pigneter, a tricky winger, and his dribbling and crossing ability causes all number of problems for Sturm and I'm willing them to score. Chances hit the post and shots are desperatwly hacked off the line then, on 89 minutes, the Sturm keeper fails to hold the ball and Norbert Kerek taps in the rebound before sprinting away leading wild celebrations from the team and their mulleted fans.

Der Tricky winger or, as the German say, der Tricky vinger.

Sadly, once again the sound of music rings out across the Donawitz Stadium and that sounds is the pissing Fratellis, this time even those permed scottish berks can't spoil what's been a great evening's entertainment in superb surroundings. I mean the mullets, not the hills - just to clarify. I've not gone soft and neither am I a groundhopper!

For a proper match report and pictures clicky here.